The newlyweds are now back at our house after their relaxing days at the spa and resort where they spent the first part of their honeymoon.  I hope the honeymoon lasts for years.  The wedding was beautiful in many ways.  The setting was perfect.  The chapel was like a perfect little gift box to wrap up the proceedings.

The bride our daughter had put so much thought into how the wedding itself should go.  Her music choices were very upbeat and cheerful.  The chapel is small so she had timed all the music perfectly so that no one was left standing for a long period of time.  She and the groom were really the only ones left to wait by themselves anywhere.  He waited in an anteroom off of the lobby while his groomsman seated the wedding guests.  She waited in the ladies parlor while her bridesmaids made their trek to the front of the chapel to wait for her.

There was no receiving line after the wedding at the church.  The wedding party scuttled down to hide in a hallway while the chapel cleared, the minister sending everyone on ahead to the country club where the reception dinner would take place.   My daughter had chosen the hors d ‘oeuvres to suit her grooms tastes, though little did she know she nor he would taste much of them once they arrived there.

Pictures were taken at the chapel.  I hurried back to the rooms to clean up and collect the brides things that needed to go with her in the limo.  At one point I came back to the chapel and everyone was gone!  For a moment I wondered if they had forgotten me or if the event had really happened.  Then I heard their voices outside.

We finally gathered everything together and both my husband and my car were loaded with ferns and boxes.  The wedding planner took the large flower arrangement we gathered the pew ribbons and whatnots.

The limousine arrived to transport the wedding party and my husband and I in our separate cars arrived at the reception.  Neither of us had thought to have a parking place reserved for us, so we found what we could.

I had not seen the place with the decorations we had planned in place.  The fireplace was lit, the mantle sparkled.  The flowers were perfection on the tables held aloft and lit from beneath  by electric votive candles under a sheer blue cloth.

The D.J. was set up on a balcony overlooking the dance floor.

The doors opened and the bride and groom’s arrival was announced.  They walked into the room and immediately began their first dance together.  They were beautiful.  We watched, almost embarrassed to see such unmitigated affection.  They were at that moment married in their love.

There were more dances, and lots and lots of food, little of which I tasted.  Though the wedding planner had everything well in hand, I found myself dithering over the smallest details.

It served to distract me.  I understood that about myself and allowed myself to give in to it.

There was an enormous outpouring of love that night from everyone there to the wedding couple and us their family.  I could feel the people who knew us best willing us to stay in the moment.  To make this new moment a memory that could sustain.

I know my  son-in-law reflected on how nice it would have been had his own mother  able to be there.  I did too.  I let that thought slip through my head for a moment but knew it too could unleash sadness.  I know there is a picture taken of the wedding couple holding a  picture of his mother and father.

I know that during my husbands speech and toast, his voice caught on the words when he spoke of his children.  I think our voices will always catch a little there, even though perhaps no one else will notice.

The wedding is over and their  life as a married couple is beginning.  For the first time yesterday I said to someone.  “I need to get back to the house, my daughter and her husband are there.”  Her husband.  My son-in-law.

There are people I have met who have lost children too.  They speak of signs from their children.  I am glad that they can find comfort in that thought.  I have not looked for signs from my son.  I don’t think I believe that is possible.  Had he that kind of power, then I wish he could have used it to prevent his accident while he was here.  I do believe the Spirit lives and intercedes at all  times on our behalf, perhaps to lay a calming hand upon our heart or remind us that we are not without hope.  Our family was joined that day in spirit and in hope for a bright future for ourselves and for the bridal couple.  I believe that our son’s spirit joined in the celebration too.

My daughter and her husband have their life with all its trials and joys before them and for that I am truly thankful.

It is fun to have them with us now, to revisit the wedding, to wait for the pictures to revisit it even more.   It is a lovely spot in my memory now to visit.    Here is to the bride and groom!