Author Archives: pathfinder

About pathfinder

Artist, Writer, Walking wounded.

Every Day is Mother’s Day

My mother used to say “every day is mother’s day.”    As a child I never knew what to make of that.   I am loath to admit I thought she meant that we were supposed to put her up … Continue reading

Posted in Coping with the Death of a Child, Holidays, Memories, mother's day | 2 Comments

Furniture

I have in my studio the one non-office chair my son purchased. It is chair from Ikea. I was with him when he shopped for it. In the Ikea store they have this  same model of the chair in a … Continue reading

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The End of March

Dear Son, Your dad has retired from his job.  He seems to be content with the choice.  He could have worked longer.  He could be like some men I know who identify so closely with their job that leaving it is … Continue reading

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The season of reason

This is the 5th Christmas season since the death of our son. Something about the numbers five, ten, fifteen and twenty and the milestones they represent taunt those of us who continue to grieve, yearn for and miss our children. … Continue reading

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Socially acceptable

  When the hard things happen in life – the failures, the losses and defeats- social media has become a spotlight that few can stand in for long. The struggle most of us already have to know the right and … Continue reading

Posted in anger, Coping with the Death of a Child, Death, Faith, Family, Friends | Leave a comment

Saturday, July 2nd

  Dear Son, I remember distinctly July 2nd 2011. I know there are details missing, but there are details that stand out – that are burned into my brain. I have a few days that are like that – but … Continue reading

Posted in Coping with the Death of a Child, Death, Family, Friends | 3 Comments

What does it taste like?

    I go out to eat.  There is something on the menu I have never seen before so feeling brave – I order it.   Everyone with me watches as the waiter places the hot plate before me.  They watch … Continue reading

Posted in Coping with the Death of a Child, Death, Family, Friends, Memories | Tagged , , , , | 4 Comments

Each passing day

  Dear son, The world is still going crazy. The government is ridiculous. People  believe crazy things and  the politicians  making crazy promises and I apologize to you. I apologize about some of the things you used to ask me … Continue reading

Posted in Coping with the Death of a Child | 7 Comments

Anger

Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years and my son’s birthday have passed. The light lingers a bit longer and the globe is repeating the pattern that slowly guides us into Spring. The year that was 2015 brought about good changes for some … Continue reading

Posted in anger, Co-dependency, Coping with the Death of a Child, Holidays, meditation, mindfulness | Tagged , , , | 5 Comments

Surviving the New Year

  I always thought it odd when reading an obituary or when one was read at a funeral that “survivors” were listed. Survived by Uncle, Aunt, sister, brother, wife, husband, mother, daughter, father. The event that caused the end of … Continue reading

Posted in Coping with the Death of a Child | 2 Comments